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Women Living Well Blog: Contoversy Over Women's Roles Boils Over

Women Living Well Blog

Sunday, June 13, 2010

Contoversy Over Women's Roles Boils Over

Hey Ladies! The first challenge of our Completing Him Summer Marriage Challenge will go up late tonight! I can't wait to get started!

In the meantime, if you'd like to see the "back story", visit this link to the recent Controversy Over Women's Roles where wrote an article about the situation.
Though there has been a lot of negative swirling, I am honestly overjoyed at such a positive response here on this site. So let's keep it positive and focus on our husbands, children, homes, and those in the community who need a helping hand. God is always watching, God is always listening, and God always cares for you!

Walk in that truth today as you Walk with the King!

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Blogger Elizabeth said...

Hi Courtney. I don't think I have ever posted here, maybe once or twice. But I have simply LOVED reading your blog - mainly because your heart for our Lord and our Savior comes through so clearly. You have demonstrated Christ's grace and mercy just beautifully during this controversy, and set a wonderful example for all of us. I have read other blogs that were mired in controversy. Very, very few of the authors handled similar situations with the class that you have. Thank you SO much for being such a wonderful example of our Savior - and keeping our eyes focused above.

God Bless,

June 13, 2010 at 8:32 AM  
Blogger Rachel said...

Thank you for writing and speaking truth. We need that boldness.

God's blessings to you!


June 13, 2010 at 8:46 AM  
Blogger becca banana said...

What a nice write-up about your challenge. I was pleased to see the way the other blogger responded to your gracious words.

June 13, 2010 at 9:09 AM  
Blogger Suzanne said...

I followed the links and read a bit of the comments at bloggy boot camp--never knew these things existed...LOL! Anyway, alot of the comments were less than gracious , but I understand where these women are coming from. They feel all their rights are being violated, they simply don't understand nor get the fact that your looking at marriage through the lens of God's design , not mans. I personally cannot understand not wanting to "spoil"our spouse a bit, I mean remember your dating days? Best behavior, hardly a hair out of place, cooked the fav dish--why do women get married and seem to forget the effort they put into the dating phase! I am so glad to be a sister in the Lord with you--your response to Jill was above reproach and gentle and kind:-)

June 13, 2010 at 9:19 AM  
Blogger Coffee and a Mop said...

Courtney, I just love your blog. You keep doing what your doing.

I just read some of the links that you listed and read some of the comments...they are laughable.

These people have it so wrong it's pathetic.

Apparantely once you get married all the "stuff" you did to please your boyfriend stops once they get married. And you wonder why divorce rates are so high or why many men don't like commitment?

As always...God's ways are what really works. And you said it right when you said that their problem is not with you but with God. Very true.

Keep going are a blessing to many women's lives including mine.

Take Care

June 13, 2010 at 10:25 AM  
Blogger Holloway Family said...

I LOVE reading your blog! I have learned many new things and enhanced the things that I already knew (does that make sense?). I have tried to better my life as a wife and mother and tried new techniques since reading your blog. I LOVE it!! For me your comments and ideas have sparked a new awareness within myself and begun many Gospel discussions between my husband and I!! I agree with the philosophy of wife and mother being at home with the children and providing a safe haven for her family. Thank you so much for your blog!!

May God bless you in your endeavors!


June 13, 2010 at 10:36 AM  
Blogger Karen said...

You are full of class, grace, and wisdom! Frankly you make all the whining, groaning, and negativity from the other's look rather ridiculous! ;)

June 13, 2010 at 11:04 AM  
Blogger ~BA~ said...

I am so sorry that there was anything negative about such a positive challenge! I echo what so many others have said - isn't this the same way we all acted when we were dating? In fact, I disagree with people (men and women) who say - my spouse knew what they were getting when they married me. I personally spoiled my husband like crazy when we were dating - and I am continuing to try and do the same thing 17 years into the marriage! :-)

June 13, 2010 at 11:44 AM  
Blogger Home's Where My Heart Is said...

Courtney, I am new to your blog and really enjoy it. I have been so saddened and disappointed by all the negative flack you've gotten. I've learned that it's so easy to criticize and ridicule what we don't understand. Please know your blog community and sisters in Christ appreciate your honesty and integrity and urge you to press on for the Kingdom. God is using you in a mighty way. Praying for you, I know it's not easy being under a microscope.


June 13, 2010 at 11:57 AM  
Blogger Redeemed1 said...

What you are presenting here is the Biblcal model for marriage. I think it wonderful and I've been so blessed by it
Unbelievers will never see it the same way - their eyes are blind. They will see it is as a"womens rights" issue.
The sad thing is that there are Christian women out ther who would fight this also - but ultimately their issue is with God and His Word, not with you or me. God's commands aren't suggestions and it really doesn't matter how we feel about them.

I have to thank you once again for the challenge - it came at a good time for me. I'm on bedrest trying to stay pregnant for several more weeks, and I'm very dependant on him right now. It's been so good for me to have to think of ways that I can serve him at a time in our lives whenhe is serving me. Without your challenge I don't know that I would have realized that I can't stop serving him just because I'm on bedrest. How I serve him certainly looks different than it normally would, but my responbility as his wife didn't stop when the contractions started.

June 13, 2010 at 12:00 PM  
Anonymous Jacquie Olsen said...

Ditto to Karen's comment. I just spent more time than I should reading Scareymom's post and the 400 comments she received. Talk about Yikes! Since I really surround myself with God's Kingdom, it is sometimes shocking to me that everyone doesn't think the way that we do in understanding the roles of husband and wife in God's fashion. Realizing that there are so many women out there who can't understand, appreciate and/or respect Godly principals truly makes me very sad. All the more reason we need to be intentional to "raise homemakers" with our daughters.

I was grateful to see that out of the many responses I did read over there, that the Christian readers did not try arguing with them but are just allowing them to rant and rave. We really can pray for them as we should be for all of the world to have their eyes and hearts opened to God's eternal truths. I feel so blessed right now knowing how much God has worked in my own heart to be able to "see".

I love serving God and His Kingdom. I love serving my husband and family. Phillipians 2:3 says: Do nothing from rivalry or conceit, but in hyumility count others more significant than yourselves. I think that says it all.

Plus, I would just like to point out that Courtney's post was perfectly fitted for the mission of her blog - to encouage Christian women to live life well according to God's purposes and glory. So to all the comments from Scareymom's responses about "what about my husband serving me?" -- This isn't about them. It's about us "women" and our roles and responsibilities. Why does the world want to play the victim? We can't control our husbands (though we sometimes try) and can only control our own behaviors. This is about being accountable to self, not pointing fingers at "but what about this and what about that and what about him".

June 13, 2010 at 12:08 PM  
Anonymous Lindsey said...

I have been reading you blog for several weeks now and felt I MUST comment after reading some of the sarcastic comments that were made concerning your challenge.

Jesus said that unbelievers would NOT understand us or our principles. We would be mocked and hated for the stand that we take. I don't know you, but I can't help but admire you for the example that you set for us who read your blog and for the way you handled this whole thing. It's apparent that you, indeed, "walk with the King."

I don't think the other ladies get it: It's about LOVE. LOVING our husbands. LOVING others as Christ has loved us. Our society is so narcissistic and it is no more evident than in those ladies' comments.

Uncondtional love does not ask, "What's in it for me?" My prayer is that I can follow the example that Jesus set for us all: humility, gentleness, compassion, service, and love. Keep on keeping on, girlfriend. Love and prayers are coming your way!


June 13, 2010 at 12:50 PM  
Blogger kewkew said...

Glad to see this fair article written about this "controversy."

Wanted to say I would love to follow your blog but every time I try it brings up my sons account and it won't let me change. So when Blogger decides to stop acting up I will be following your blog!

June 13, 2010 at 2:20 PM  
Anonymous Brandy said...

I'm a pretty new reader, Courtney ... but I LOVE your blog! Don't you let the negative junk going on upset you ... you're doing GOOD stuff here!

I look forward to reading everyone's first challenge! I'm working on mine right now!!

June 13, 2010 at 5:41 PM  
Anonymous Jen at Soulfull Cafe said...

Courtney, you have much more grace than I do. I am such a proud woman. Thank you for your advise to us readers to "keep it positive" and that "God is always watching". After reading your post, I decided to delete a comment I left on She Posts. Jesus tells us to "turn the other cheek". I think in this situation, it means for me to not contribute to this discussion, but to gracefully keep my mouth shut, and just pray. You already have said everything that needs to be said. Thank you. I look forward to getting on with the Challenge and letting this controversy go. I thank God for how he has glorified Himself through this.
I pray that God will continue to give you the inspiration and wisdom you need to lead this challenge. May God give you a joyful heart. Bless you today.

June 13, 2010 at 8:47 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I think everyone gets into that "rut" in marriage where we slack off on what our job truly is--to be a helpmate to our husbands. I think your challenge is a great reminder that we were made to be loving, serving and submissive to our husbands.The Bible is crystal clear on the roles God created for man and woman.
Keep your head high knowing that you are inspiring many (perhaps even those ladies on the other blog)to choose to lead Christ-centered lives, and reminding us of our true calling and priorities.

June 13, 2010 at 10:28 PM  
OpenID fallingintofavor said...

Wow. I missed the controversy, I came here from Like a Warm Cup of Coffee! But I do love reading your blog. And your response to controversy as well. God is clearly doing something with us women, seeing that many blogs have been focused on women's roles. He is amazing.

June 13, 2010 at 10:45 PM  
Anonymous Jen C. said...

"But I want you to understand that Christ is the head of every man, and the man is the head of a woman, and God is the head of Christ. " 1 Cor 11:3

As a Christian wife do I look down on my husband for submitting to Christ as Christ is the head? Absolutely not! So why would we be looked down upon for submitting to our husbands? God created us and we are blessed to have a handbook of how we should live the life he gave us. He knows what is best for us so why would we choose to go against it? Thank you for this challenge and all that you are doing!

June 13, 2010 at 10:55 PM  
Blogger Dusty said...

I think Lindsey said it best:

"Jesus said that unbelievers would NOT understand us or our principles. We would be mocked and hated for the stand that we take. I don't know you, but I can't help but admire you for the example that you set for us who read your blog and for the way you handled this whole thing. It's apparent that you, indeed, "walk with the King."

Amen to that one!

June 14, 2010 at 9:18 AM  
Anonymous Michelle S. said...

Hi Courtney,

I think you are doing such a great job. I am with you 100% on submitting to your husband. Gods ways will always work! I am doing your challenge though I don't have a blog. You are handling it all very well. All of us are behind you and most of all so is God. Keep it up!!

June 14, 2010 at 9:40 AM  
Anonymous Leah said...

I, for one, am thankful for the controversy because it led me to your blog! I discovered the Scary Mom blog from a local news broadcast and the first post I clicked on was her mocking of your challenge, which led me here. Sometimes God stirs us up to get us to remember why we are committed to His word! I am living proof of this right now!

God Bless You, Courtney! Thank you for being a strong woman in Christ!

June 21, 2010 at 8:35 AM  
Anonymous beth said...

Thank you SOOOO much for your encouragement and staying so biblical and positive and unwavering when I am sure you are under alot of attack. Stay close to Jesus. I am praying for you. Thank you for the beauty of your love for Him and for your hubby and family. Thank you for a place I know I can always come and be challenged and encouraged and lifted up to get back in the battle for our hearts and marriages and hubbies and precious little ones. IT is so easy to get discouraged/depressed or mired down in self pity and pride and so many traps. We need a safe place like this to come be refreshed.
Thank you for being so gracious and loving and persistant even when under attack. These areas are so controversial and of course people will disagree. Thank you for your loving boldness. I am sure God is using it all to grow you in your dependence on Him and your faith and love.

July 2, 2010 at 4:48 PM  

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